Vampyrism, am I a vampyre?
Thursday, Aug. 12, 2004 @ 06:21
I decided to fill out a checklist about my darker habits. I came to the conclusion that I am more goth than vampyric, but still they are very related. Well...
>You feel the "need" to drink blood
-yes
>You feel "high" when drinking blood
-yes
>You think about blood a lot
-definitely
>Drinking blood satisfies your "hunger" (not sexual)
-that�s right
>Craving for blood
-yes, to the point where I wish I wasn�t drinking Pepsi, but rather blood. Could you imagine people selling that? Didn�t think so, but that is a fantasy of mine.
>When you don't drink blood, do you feel drained and lethargic?
-no, not really
>Does drinking blood give you a sense of peace?
-yes it does
>You feel more at ease at night
-yes I do
>You wear a lot of black
-always!
>You feel as if you don't fit into this modern world, and wish you could revisit a past time period
-yes, that would be cool
>You feel you were "born" this way
-yes, I was meant for it, I did it for myself, not because I saw someone else doing it.
>You need Pranic Energy (life force) to survive
-yes
>In a room full of people, you suddenly feel very alive, very strong
-no, I always feel different, no matter where I am.
>You are psychic
-nope
>You have empathic abilities where you can easily understand others and feel their pain
-yes; I was told I am very empathetic
>Magic comes easily to you, as do many occult practices
-magic, nah, forget it
>You've had one or several paranormal experiences
-yes; I need to get the courage to write about them
>These experiences seem to seek you out
well, maybe
>You can "feed" on energy, as well as, have the ability to give it
-that�s right
>You drink blood while in a sexual situation, but not for sexual reasons
-yes
>You may be bisexual
-but I�m not
>Do you look younger than your age?
-no, I look about three years older
>Do people mistake you for being younger than you actually are?
-never
>You have a strong imagination and are very artistic/expressive in some way
-yes, in some way, but I don�t always share my thoughts with others.
>Your cuts heal quicker than normal
-yes, too fast, but it�s a good thing because people don�t think they are as bad as they really were.
>Carpe Diem~You seize the day
-me? Yeah right!
>You are very passionate about everything
-or I try to be
>You are very dramatic
-I can be, hah hah!
>You've been described as "odd" or "intense" or "centric" without even trying to be
-maybe, but I don�t care what others think
>People are naturally drawn to you
-yeah, in another lifetime, sometimes it seems like my presence drives them away.
>You feel the need to be alone a lot
-yes, serenity!
>Sometimes the loneliness can become so intense you feel that no one "understands" you
-yes, exactly, but why should they?
>You notice things that others do not, like the tiniest detail
-most times, but it�s not instant like others think, it takes a while but doesn�t take hours of concentration.
>Your senses are unusually heightened
-yes, especially at night
>As a child, you were very sensitive to the sights and sounds around you
-yes
>Your hearing is impeccable
-yes
>Your sense of smell is acute
-yeah yeah
>Photosensitivity, especially to sun and UV
-yes, I hate the sun
>Preference for nighttime and dusk and early morning over daytime
-yes Definitely.
>Ability to sense location of living things in dark or near-dark
-yes
>Empathy to others' emotions and physical sensations
-yes, if they are really strong then I gets scared and I don�t know what to do.
> Ability to get along well with cats and somewhat communicate with them
-yes Always had that.
>Love of storms
-yes but only thunderstorms, blizzards, and tornados, but anything more severe scares the hell out of me. Oh I can feel one approaching, the rain isn�t over yet.
>Emotional intensity and difficult temper
-sometimes, but I�m �tentative� most of the time.
>Weakness and lethargy much of the time, but strong when emotionally motivated
-yes, I�m glad to have determination when I need it most.
>A close encounter with death several years ago
-Yes, but not several years ago, I recently had one only day ago and I am still freaked out about it. Only one person knows about it and it�s not my mother. I would like to share it but I promised to keep that shit to a minimum on my diary, and others don�t need to read it. That experience is going to remain on my laptop.
>Attraction to gothic culture, especially to women who look like Morticia; love of gothic music; tendency to go dance at Goth clubs.
-yes, I have a Goth fetish, as for Morticia, bleh... I�d rather be myself. I like Goth boys who are thin, pale, and elegant, who dress in silk shirts, waistcoats, spikes, and black trousers... I think the Gothic attitude and look appeals to the mind in a way that most other forms of flaunting sensuality do not. Playboy bunnies? Spice Girls? Fabio? Oh, puh-leeze! I'm sure it's aesthetic enough, but it does not engage my brain. Nor does it seem to celebrate the mind the way much of Gothic sensuality does. Not all Goths are intellectual, of course. I am attracted to Goth rock and also the literary and artistic culture. I only went to a goth club once and I loved it!
� -I own a cape
-of course
"vampiric traits"
No garlic allergy
-no, People who suffer from porphyria often have this.
>no problem with mirrors
-of course not
>no problem with crosses or holy objects of any religion
-no, I appreciate them, especially symbols from Egyptian origin.
>no desire to dominate others (at least no conscious desire)
-that�s right, nor do I like to be lead. I don�t like the thought of leading others, although there is evidence of that from some people. I�m very independent.
>no fangs
-why not?
>no coffin
-not yet, I will get one someday
>no proof of extended lifespan or phenomenal healing ability
-none of that
>no strong desire to play vampire role-playing games, though it might be amusing for a change
-I haven�t had that desire.
>You have always been interested in Vampires
-fascinating
>You feel you are one with them
-I feel like myself
>You believe that Vampires exist
-yes
>You dream about Vampires, or fantasize about them
-not all the time
>You've read every Vampire book and seen every movie on the subject
-I wish, but no
>You want to be a Vampire
-It�s hard to be labeled, I want to be me! Jenna
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