Dull. Extremely dull
Sunday, Feb. 15, 2004 @ 02:09
First of all I should begin this with a happy note. Districts turned out to be a great meet, besides some of the people, swimming was the best. My first event: 50 meter free style, I improved by two seconds. Thomas�s goggles fell off during this event and he lost three seconds, and Mike passed him by just one second.
Third event: 100 meter back stroke, I also improved by two seconds.
Now the second event: 100 meter free style, I improved by... ten seconds! And I really believed I was near my peak performance before. Guess not. Now looking forward to CWASSA, and my coach wants me to improve those times even more. In CWASSA I have to swim a 100 IM (all the strokes) which I am not looking forward to.
I was hoping to write these results earlier on but I never had time to. Something terrible happened. Far worse than the break up between Tyler and I. Yeah I know that didn�t seem to last very long.
But anyway there is like a huge war at school. Someone is going to get hurt and I am afraid it�s going to be me. For the most part I am handling this okay but that�s only because I am trying not to let it get to me. Through and through I�ve been talking about this with Kylie, but I shouldn�t always have to go to her when I have a problem. I�m going mad. I�ve always wanted to leave that school. It�s come to the worst. I have a bad burning in my chest (stress) and I keep trying to not give in to this urge to make myself bleed. If I do this though I could lose everything. On the other hand I deserve it. I kept myself from crying, but it was especially hard when I was watching survivor and that other Jenna chick pulled herself out of the game and everyone else was crying and then her mother died. That proves behind the scenes the contestants receive updates. I see that was urgent though.
Back at school, I have a few people on my side. If I go to higher authority they will honestly think I�m nuts... I swear to Goth, Thomas you will pay! He was the cause of my break up, and he�s saying some events took place in Edmonton which didn�t happen, and this could possibly break apart another relationship. Tonight I emailed another friend and talked this through. He said:
�I am sorry this has been the worst valentines day ever... Don't worry it's going to be okay. Let them talk. They're not worth our time. Jenna you don't deserve to be treated like this at all, just don�t give in and everything will be okay. Don't worry about it. Just please don�t resort to the razor blades. I will stand by you through all of this, no matter what they say. Yeah I agree with you exactly, Thomas is a bad ... liar. He may destroy Mike and crystal�s relationship. I don't think that you did anything with mike in Edmonton. There's just no way. I am not saying that they're right, or that there words are credible. I am saying that there is no evidence of these actions. Therefore, I say that you can't believe anything they say and the roomer is a lie. the co-coach was with you almost all the time. So I would like to know how you could have done these things? I really hope this helps you, so take care and see you soon.�
Everything he said was true and so pure, and it really helped a lot. How could someone like Thomas have such cruel intentions? I almost have a sense of pity towards him because he feels he has to make everyone feel terrible. I understand now why he�d do this. I was all part of his game. He likes Crystal . . .
Miss these?
Letting It Go - Sunday, Mar. 09, 2008
Moment of Disbelief - Thursday, Mar. 06, 2008
What the... - Sunday, Mar. 02, 2008
No More Cavities - Friday, Feb. 29, 2008
Ridiculousness - Tuesday, Feb. 19, 2008