Boredom
Monday, Dec. 29, 2003 @ 21:59
Never go shopping for major deals after Christmas. I just found out the hard way I don�t fit in large crowds. There is no time to take your time shopping, you have to know exactly what your getting or you wont be able to buy anything at all. At least that�s how it was for me and mum. We went to the gap and I bought pants that were to large for me and a sweater that itches my skin badly. That�s how much we had to rush around.
Well that was the worst of it, cause then we went to chapters where there was less people and the deal was 75 percent off. Much better than the gap! I bought �Vampire Lestat� and �Interview With the Vampire� by Anne Rice. I already read them both and the next in the series is �Queen of the Damned� which I already seen as a movie.
I was so bored in order to complete both books right away. My mother has left for Kingston to work at the penetentry. I am so lonely, all my friends are with their families for the holidays and my cousin is in Alberta. I get to talk to him online but that is not the same, I still feel isolated somehow. I will have to suffer for 3 days being by myself!?! That is not cool. Now I have nothing to do. Just sit in front of this computer and write.
I need to write this but I am so ashamed to write this. I did it again. Not because I was depressed, but because I was blood thirsty. I wonder what could have been more dangerous, making sure you cut deep enough for blood, or careless cutting from being depressed. I really wanted to bleed. That sounds crazy now that I write about it but at the time it was such a burning desire. This cut was so much deeper from before, through the skin right to the flesh. I am not by any means trying to be like a vampire, nor am I addicted to the taste of my own blood. I think this is less dangerous because I wasn�t constantly cutting. But here�s the plus side, I won�t be doing that for a while again.
Well I guess it�s better if I leave this at that.
Jenna
Song: Evanescence � �Hello�
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