I have done my best.
Sunday, May. 13, 2007 @ 03:56
I made the mistake of warning my LL that I gave the letter to his wife. He became so fearful that he tried convincing me to take it back. He also said that we should have talked about it first, but I got so fedup with being in this situation, I had to do something. I refused his demands and told him that she should know about it so he went to the store and snatched it off of her desk, practically right from under her nose. He told her that I do things like this just to hurt people. You see how he fabricates things? Then while they were planting stuff in the back I heard him say lies after lies after lies.
The next day I went to talk to her. I was scared out of my mind but I knew it was the right thing to do. This time I didn�t tell him I told her about it. I told her why he was so desperate to hide the letter from her. She took the news better than I thought she would. She wasn�t impressed, obviously, but she was very inquisitive. She asked so many questions about the affair. Then she ended the conversation abruptly by telling me she was going to discuss it with her husband. I�m not sure what happened but they were still their normal selves yesterday. So I assume he told her that I made it up. Maybe he told her the truth and they want to move on from it. Of course I want to think the second, but knowing who he is now, it certainly couldn�t be. He hasn�t called me and I don�t want to speak to him anyway and he knows my mother is visiting me.
I won�t press the truth because she will always wonder if it was true or not. I have completed my task of ending the relationship. I will never under any circumstances allow it to continue. My intention was not to try and split them up. It really got to the point where the only way it would end was by telling the wife about it.
In the end, if she believed him over me, she better not come crying to me if he cheats on her with someone else. I truly believe that once a cheater, always a cheater. I�ve seen it with people my age and with people their age. He will become close to another woman and sexual urges will get the better of him. But he�s got his wife so trapped, and dependent on him, that she can�t do anything without him anyway. What a genius. I also became very sick of the fact that he thinks that he lives in an imaginary world, where everyone and everything is perfect. He seriously wanted me to believe that he loved me, but after January�s incident, I never reverted to those feelings, otherwise I could have become very suicidal.
This experience has taught me a lot of things. First, I will never put myself in a situation so close to a married man. Second, I know I am an honest person, no matter what others want to believe. Third,, people like my LL are very good conversationalists, they know exactly what people want to hear, even if it�s not the truth, and they deceive people by fabricating the truth. It feels wonderful knowing I realized who he really is before it was too late.
Jenna
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